|"If you don't let me do Hagbah, I'll crush your beitzim!"|
Top 10 Signs That You Are An "Orthodox Jewish Feminist"-Part 2!
- You believe that Queen Esther was a subjugated Bais Yankef girl who lacked the courage to stand up to that chareidi Mordechai. You revere Queen Vashti as the leader of the five imahot (biblical matriarchs).
- Role Model: Lilith- the she-demon of pagan "Jewish" folklore, since she has the capacity to hurt men.
- As a lifetime member and chairperson, you have the complete set of JOFA (Jewish Orthodox Feminists Alliance) "Limited Edition" tote bags, along with accompanying nutcrackers.
- Committed to gaining "equality" by any means necessary.
- You use a lift-and-cut norelco to clean above your upper lip. But never during sefirah.
- You once punched out a gabai when he laughed and refused your offer to do hagbah.
- You have a pair of foreskin winter gloves.
- Currently studying for semicha. Construction foreman by day.
- Waiting anxiously for techiyat hameitim so you can have a word with the chauvinistic Rabbis of the Talmud.
- Facebook password-Very well encrypted: BRURYAHLilithVashtimullet79all men must pay